The move
She is sitting at her kitchen counter right now. it is 5:39 PM and the lemon custards are baking in the oven. there’s a man in the next room with his head sets probably listening to the cure or some obscure early 90s rock band and reading about technology. this feels like home. this is the best time of the day. this is when we are quiet and have time to think.
::This is the Chicago Brown Line to the loop. Next stop Washington/Wells. Doors exit on the right at Washington/Wells::
rings in my ears as I recall every morning and every evening, Monday thru Friday, riding the EL to and from work.
After living in Chicago for the past 15 months, i have developed a love-hate relationship with the bee-like frenzy of the city.
I can say it is something i will miss. i’ll miss the Filipino family that runs the coffee shop across the street and the heavenly Ensaimadas they made that were little cloud puffs with angel dust on top. i’ll miss the demand for excellence and the absence of food chains. I’ll miss that you can satiate a craving for a night of African Peanut Soup followed by an Improv show. I’ve developed some very specific cravings after living in the city. It’s like an enormous world with its arms outstretched to its inhabitants saying, “how may i assist you this evening?”
that’s the positive side at least.
the city has also sneered at me quite a few times. it’s raised its dress and shat on me. it’s laughed at me, punched me and taken my money. it has seduced me, gotten me intoxicated and had its way with me.
this morning we went to my apartment and packed all of my belongings into my little mini cooper. i’ve had to lighten my load a good bit. it gets lighter each move that i make. this time i threw away all of the bedding and shoes i’ve had for so many years. there is something very profound in retiring your belongings. it’s almost as if saying you’re willing to keep growing and learning and living. i will not rely on my past, i will not be stuck in my ways. i tend to love the used and beat up. all my shoes have holes and wounds that seem to say, “i have walked this earth! and have the shoes to prove it”. but it is time. time for me to retire my things of old. i have stepped out of the clothes of a child and into those of an adult.
With that said, in the next few days I will be moving back to the town I grew up in to finish something I started. I will say that one of the merits to a small town like Ruston, LA is the community that is not only available but desired by the majority of its inhabitants. some of the truest to humanity stories come out of a small town. maybe it’s just that we have the time to tell our stories. or perhaps we have the time to listen. Some might think I’m crazy, but I am actually excited about my time in Ruston. I hope you will all have something to say—that we can be a part of a conversation..
i’m glad to be here.
